05.29.09
Posted in beach thoughts (smacked by the Universe till I learn) at 1:40 pm by Beach Chick
Whenever feelings of resentment crop up about someone or some situation – shift your awareness. What aspect of yourself is crying out for attention?
Beach tip of the Day: Oldie but goodie. Shuffle your feet when wading and you won’t step on sting rays.
I felt resentment towards my former mother-in-law this week. It was surprising because I thought I was “more evolved” than that. (I love how the Universe smacks you off your high horse – sometimes before you even know you climbed aboard.)
After all, I am out of the situation. I no longer feel the need to protect the man or the life I had. He can take care of himself. And I have now chosen the life of my dreams.
I understand that she lives her life out of fear and scarcity. That society, the depression and religion taught her both. That she is old and has lived all her life this way – it has served her well in her own mind. That I should be empathetic of her situation. Her husband is gone mentally yet the shell is there. That she is alone for the first time. Yada, yada…
Normally – I am fine with all of that. And then, an overwhelming feeling of resentment slammed me. But this time, I stopped. I voiced it and breathed. And sat with it – letting curiousity roll around with it in the back of my head.
And I found myself.
Scary stuff. That feeling was not about her, it was about me.
I choose to live knowing I am a beloved child of the Universe – I am she and she is me. I choose to believe that the right things/people come into your life just as you need them. I choose abundance and love.
But I realized that I am worried that somehow I could “slip and fall” into fear and scarcity. And that just by having that thought – I confirm it. That if I don’t work hard or do everything right – abundance and love will abandon me. All because I don’t deserve it. So, in that moment of resentment – I resented the societal beliefs inside me that can still crop up and challenge me.
It wasn’t about her at all. It was that I too can be manipulative and self centered. I probably always will have those moments. Hopefully I will limit them and temper them with kindness and awareness – but it still scared the crap out of me that I saw her in me.
And so, I stopped and loved that part of myself. Understanding that we all have a “survival” mode and it crops up in odd ways. That I choose the behavior and beliefs that deal with it.
I choose the abundance and love of an interconnected Universe. I choose to baby and love that part of me and know that no matter how I react – that non judgemental abundance and love will never change.
And so, that tiny bit of resentment awareness has reminded me of everything good.
Blessed be…
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05.15.09
Posted in beach thoughts (smacked by the Universe till I learn) at 1:10 pm by Beach Chick
The phrase “less is more” applies to our inner lives also. Think “less judgement, more openness”. It creates a space for miracles in our lives.
Beach tip of the day: Instead of bringing the usual cases of bottled water on your beach vacation, try an earth friendly alternative. Bring a water filter pitcher, gallon milk jugs and some cheap reusable water bottles. Decorate the water bottles with permanent marker – put names, drawings or nicknames on each. Everyone can choose a favorite and “own” it! Bring out the jugs in the cooler… instead of the individual plastic bottles and refill as needed. Easy!
My life has changed drastically over the past few months. And yet if you looked at the surface – you wouldn’t see much change at all. I still live the same, work the same and enjoy the same things.
But because I have let go of the thinking that things HAVE to be a certain way, new (and old) things have opened for me.
First, it is just easier to think – things are as they should be. Takes a hell of a lot of stress and angst out of my daily life. Not that I don’t choose to live a certain way or know what I like and don’t like – but I feel more open to letting things be.
Second, relationships have become fun and happy things. I have weeded out those who don’t respect or bring value into my life, instead of struggling to “make it work”. I am revisiting old ones that I had ditched but did work in some ways with a different attitude. And finding miracles. Following my peaceful core, understanding that everyone is not only in the right place for them – but if I choose them for my life – I must respect where they are.
Finally, I truly honor and respect where I am – and have allow Universal flow into my life. I guess because I feel strong in my connections and trust – I no longer have to make it all happen. I choose. But I am finding myself choosing by checking into the me that is connected with the Universe – then opening up if there are no conflicts.
I know my awareness will ebb and flow. But now I am trying to build in “check in” moments to remind myself that I want to live from my heart – not my ego.
Blessed be…
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05.11.09
Posted in beach thoughts (smacked by the Universe till I learn) at 1:01 pm by Beach Chick
You choose how others treat you.
Beach tip of the day: Take the time to watch the rhythm of the different shorebirds walk. Stately herons, darting sanderlings, determined willets, goofy seagulls. All will make you smile!
My feelings were hurt yesterday. And all I could think of is why? Why would someone do that if they profess to care for me? I was filled with righteous indignation for about a minute, red hot fury for 30 seconds and finally the knowing that I chose this. And that really stunk – I liked the righteous fury better…
I realized that I have allowed the poor behavior and even though I have stood up for myself several times – nothing changed at the core. And I allowed it by choosing to have a relationship with this person.
I determine how people treat me. I choose who I want in my life. And I can walk away from those who don’t honor me. Just as they can do the same thing.
And even if it is a person who is tied to you for life – family, an ex, etc. You can choose to walk away mentally and shield yourself.
I take responsibility for my hurt feelings. Sure, the action wasn’t cool or kind. But I stuck around for it.
Walk away and know that you have honored the Universe. (It will also make you happier!)
Blessed be
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05.09.09
Posted in beach thoughts (smacked by the Universe till I learn) at 12:57 pm by Beach Chick
The settling of the soul is similar to the feeling a woman has after nesting in a new home and finally sitting down to enjoy the space.
Beach tip of the day: Walk the beach at the same time daily. You will realize how it changes dramatically each day. The weather, surf, tides and animal life vary in a surprising way, constantly delighting in its newness. Enjoy the same and different!
My soul is settling. It told me so this morning. I was startled because it was a whisper from inside so loud I looked around. I have been “nesting” within for a while now. Putting thoughts and feelings in order. Making choices that bring peace, passion and purpose. I am not finished, but today I knew that I have come a long way. I know my dharma and am acting on that knowledge. I stand up for myself in a strong, centered way – with conviction and (hopefully) kindness. I no longer feel the need to go anywhere but within to make these choices.
And so, I got an “atta girl” from within this morning. A peaceful settling that lets me know I am enjoying the space that is me. A deep down sigh of content. A snuggling of my soul – like when my physical body enjoys a rainy afternoon with a good book, cup of tea and soft afghan.
I know this is a plateau for me. A breather on the long journey. I savor this moment and yet, I am excited about the next surprise in store for me.
I love it when a plan comes together!
Blessed be
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05.05.09
Posted in beach thoughts (smacked by the Universe till I learn) at 1:16 pm by Beach Chick
Embrace your inner freak, the Universe has a plan that includes him/her.
Beach tip of the day: If you can hear thunder, get off the beach. Don’t wait until you see lightening.
I realized this morning that I no longer balk and hide my inner freak. Instead, I am reveling in her. I used to think I needed to live a suburban mom life or my children would be scarred. Not learning how to become happy productive adults. What a bunch of hooey. I taught them fear and conformity instead.
I have been filled with longing to find someone to share my life with – a.b. (after Bob). Now, through a series of small wake up calls I have realized that it isn’t what I am suppose to be focused on. That isn’t my dharma. It is pressure from society and fear of being alone. Both are old leftover thoughts that I don’t believe.
But, my inner freak knew the right thing. Without conscious thought I developed my living arrangement just for me. It has no room for a full time man. No room in the closet, no room in my bathroom, no room in my nuturing soul. Doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy men – or love them. Just means that I have arranged my house so they are only guests. At least for now.
My inner freak seems to know just what I need at this moment – what the Universe is asking of me.
So, I find myself listening and getting more and more excited about work and my life. Being in the now. Not needing to angst, worry or rage against the machine. It is odd but the more I embrace the little critter – the more peaceful I get.
A clear sign that my inner freak is in tune with the Universe and for the moment – so am I. I am incredibly grateful.
Blessed be…
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05.01.09
Posted in beach thoughts (smacked by the Universe till I learn) at 10:15 pm by Beach Chick
The right people come into your life at exactly the right time.
Beach Tip of the Day: Obey the warning flags.
beach safety warning flags
The right people come into my life exactly at the right time. I believe that the Universe is caring for me – so this isn’t a stretch. I read a book recently that said when you change, people fall by the wayside. That your “elevator is empty”. But soon, you attract people that are just what you need.
It is happening. More and more I am running into people who are spiritual, who “get” me.
I also am finding that as I concentrate on career options – doors are opening. It isn’t easy or exactly right, but it is interesting and a challenge.
I think that is better!
Blessed be.
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