05.05.09
embrace your inner freak
Embrace your inner freak, the Universe has a plan that includes him/her.
Beach tip of the day: If you can hear thunder, get off the beach. Don’t wait until you see lightening.
I realized this morning that I no longer balk and hide my inner freak. Instead, I am reveling in her. I used to think I needed to live a suburban mom life or my children would be scarred. Not learning how to become happy productive adults. What a bunch of hooey. I taught them fear and conformity instead.
I have been filled with longing to find someone to share my life with – a.b. (after Bob). Now, through a series of small wake up calls I have realized that it isn’t what I am suppose to be focused on. That isn’t my dharma. It is pressure from society and fear of being alone. Both are old leftover thoughts that I don’t believe.
But, my inner freak knew the right thing. Without conscious thought I developed my living arrangement just for me. It has no room for a full time man. No room in the closet, no room in my bathroom, no room in my nuturing soul. Doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy men – or love them. Just means that I have arranged my house so they are only guests. At least for now.
My inner freak seems to know just what I need at this moment – what the Universe is asking of me.
So, I find myself listening and getting more and more excited about work and my life. Being in the now. Not needing to angst, worry or rage against the machine. It is odd but the more I embrace the little critter – the more peaceful I get.
A clear sign that my inner freak is in tune with the Universe and for the moment – so am I. I am incredibly grateful.
Blessed be…
